Posts tagged with ‘puns’ include the following:
Really digging Buzzfeed quizzes lately.
Hey NERDS, this year’s Portrait Valentines are done! Print them out and eat them.
If you’d like to support me buy them here! Or come to my recitals once in a while. It wouldn’t kill you.
America’s longest married couple
Also I think this was overlooked because of the other two films I included with it, but come on.
Sorry sorry sorry
I reaped what I’d sown.
(My mum was named Honorary Chair of the 2013 Joan Knechel Memorial Walk.)
Are you the Chamber of Secrets? Because I’d probably need to use my tongue skillfully to get inside you.
Am I the Whomping Willow? Because when you get near me I flail around and endanger lives.
Are you Peter Pettigrew? Because if I found out you’d been living in my room my whole life I’d get over it pretty quickly.
Are you the flying Ford Anglia? Because even if you’d been living in the woods for months I’d still want to get inside you.
Are you a portkey? Because when we touch I feel transported. And then a bit sick.
Are you the Elder Wand? Because I feel like if I kill your boyfriend you’ll end up with me.
Are you Hogwarts? Because your inner workings confuse the shit out of me.
Are you a Boggart? Because when I look at you, I think of commitment.
Are you Hermione Granger? Because I think about you sexually a lot.